I have decided to write a very short story over the next few weeks, changing it as it goes depending on the word of the week (I do not have an ultimate outcome in mind, but will play with it each week to see where it takes me). As such, this is a continuation of last week’s Sunday Scribblings (human). Let me know what you think and if you have suggestions along the way.
Indulgence
At this stage, it seems pointless to place blame, but if forced, it would fall in this order: the man who provided one-half of my genetic material, the courts for allowing it to happen, and to myself for not stopping the cycle.
I was a mistake, as I was able to perceive from an early age, and driven home by those in my life. He was drunk, she was (as decided by the jury) willing, and I became the choker chain of life dangling forever from his neck. “Justice”, being what it is, ensured that upon the expiration of the woman from whom I emerged, I was consigned to the signatory on the $137.36 court ordered bi-weekly support check. From the moment of my arrival, his favorite indulgence was forbidding every one of mine.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Powerful final sentence! You're doing a great job of disrobing your anger and bitterness overall, but I do have one suggestion. 'Seems' takes away from the direct power of the first sentence. It would work to just say 'At this stage, it's pointless to place blame,...' etc.
Great read - drew me in and made me want more. Can't wait to see where you go with this!
53 miles is crazy!! That's amazing! Where abouts are you?
I'm going to run this afternoon.
Very well written!
i await the rest... and i'm excited to read to see how it goes.
Post a Comment